For jeans you want to opt for mid to low-rise dark denim with dark stitching in a boot cut or flared leg. The darker the color, the better for a minimizing effect. The leg width helps balance out your back end while you maintain a classic silhouette. Also look for pairs that offer a back pocket. Make sure that when you put them on that the pockets sit as centered over the midpoint of your backside as possible. Pockets help further facilitate the illusion of minimizing so the larger the pocket, the smaller your butt appears.
Most of the same rules for denim are applicable to searching for dress pants. You want to look for darker colors with a generous leg opening that sit at the hips. The low waist helps conceal/cut your back-end in half. For skirts and dresses, lean towards a pencil or flared opening. These two styles offer the best fit for your body but still help balance your silhouette. A-line skirts have the propensity to make your bottom half appear even larger.
When choosing jackets, go for darker colors that either flare over your butt or graze below it. Make sure that the fit is close to your body, allowing the jacket to show the contours of your shape while your back-end is covered and camouflaged.
Of course it almost goes without saying that besides body shapers, a good tailor will become your new best friend and best investment. In the future, focus on finding pants or skirts that fit comfortably over your hips and bottom. Any tailor worth his weight in sewing needles should be able to take in the waist to most your bottoms - old and new - providing you with pants and the like that fit properly.
Your situation is just another example that we all have body image issues to work through. Use the tips and minimizing tricks that work best for you, but try not to get too upset if you still feel like your backside is taking center stage. Sometimes instead of getting frustrated we must learn to accept the things we cannot change while changing what's in our power. Your butt may just be one of the things you can't change so accept it and focus on what's in front of you, not what's behind. Only then will you, and others, appreciate all of the other assets you have to offer.
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