Dear Shopping Savage...

Dear Shopping Savage,

I need you to settle a debate that my roommate and I are having. She recently had a job interview and asked if she could borrow a pair of heels to wear. I told her sure, but being who she is, she chose the most expensive pair I own - my first, and might I add only, pair of black Louboutin pumps! When she returned them they seemed a bit stretched and I noticed a few scuffs. I told her she should reimburse me for them and keep them since they don't fit as well anymore and the scuffs irk me. She argues that she'll pay for the damage to be repaired but not for the shoes. Who's right? Should she own up and pay me for the shoes or should I lighten up and let her pay for the repairs and live with them?

Signed,

Red Hot Over Red Soles

------------

Dear R.H.O.R.S.,

Treating this as if it were "Fashion Court", you both have an argument. Looking at it from your vantage point, your prized footwear was damaged and deemed, in your opinion, "unwearable" where as she believes the shoes could be returned and worn once repaired.

A judicious suggestion would be to have her take the shoes to a quality shoe repair shop and have them fix all that ails you about the shoes and see if you can once again love them. If you still can't find it in you to love your old soles then try listing them on a site like eBay, Craigslist or take them to a local high-end designer consignment shop and gauge which refurbished route will garner you the best financial return. Now that the shoes have been repaired to "like new" condition you may get back most of what you originally paid for them.

Once the shoes have sold, see if your roommate will either cover the remaining cost of a new pair of Louboutins or split the remaining balance in half with you. Since you did tell her that she could borrow a pair of shoes for the interview, and failed to mention that there were pairs off limits, you have to take ownership of your part in this shoe debacle.

Going forward, it would serve you well to create some boundaries for your wardrobe/accessories to avoid having a calamity like this happen in the future.

In the case of roommate vs roommate, the ruling has been delivered. Fashion court is adjourned.

Have a fashion question? Need sartorial advice? Email me: Dwaun@shoppingsavage.com

Follow me on twitter

Dear Shopping Savage...

Dear Shopping Savage,

I have a friend who's constantly borrowing my clothing. If she returns them at all they come back in dire need of care. How can I politely tell her to launder my things before she returns them or really, how do I get her to stop borrowing from me altogether?

Signed,

Best Fashion Friend

------------

Dear B.F.F.,

You sound like a nice person. So nice in fact that your friend is either knowingly walking all over you, or blissfully unaware of the damage she's doing to your friendship - and not to mention your wardrobe.

The next time she asks to borrow something (assuming she does in fact ask) you need to seize that moment to remind her of how one-sided this business of borrowing has been. Make sure you relay to her how inconvenient - and costly! - her obsession with your closet is, and that a few boundaries need to be set.

First, she is not allowed to wear anything before you've had the opportunity to do so. Next, make her aware of anything that is completely off limits including jewelry - sentimental or otherwise, shoes, intimates and personal products (e.g. perfumes, lotions, makeup, etc.). If she does borrow something, she has to return it in the same, or better, condition than when she acquired it. This also means holding her accountable for replacing anything that she ruins. Lastly, she must borrow and return things in a timely manner. You can negotiate on how large a window of time she has but it would be wise to keep track of the things she borrows just to make sure everything you loan out is indeed returned.

As said before, you sound like a nice person. A nice person who doesn't deserve to have a friend walk all over you, quite possibly in your shoes no less. If you confront her and set forth ground rules she'll either agree or disagree, but let her answer surprise you. You don't want to go into a situation like this with preconceived notions. If your friendship is as strong as you would like to believe, she shouldn't have a problem respecting your wardrobe wishes and you'll get your clothing back without losing your friend. But on the off chance she decides that the new rules are for the birds, then let her fly. Life's too short for fair-weathered fashion friends.

Need sartorial advice? Email me: ShoppingSavage@gmail.com